literature

Loyalty Ch.9

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Time to Think
"I know you're real. If I doubt it I can look in a mirror. I've got memories, our stories and fight written all over me."

The human saw the fear in ruby red eyes and it bewildered him as well as it sent a spear of something hot and uneasy through his chest. This was all kinds of bizarre. But, he kept up with Zim anyway, scuffling along the cracked sidewalk and up the pathway. "Nah. My dad's not even home." Which wasn't that surprising now that he looked back on his fears earlier. He was in no danger of being grounded…

The last time had been because of the damage of public property. The law had contacted his Father. It had been the one and only time he'd been grounded before. A humiliating experience that he was loathe to repeat. Lately, he'd been trying to stay on his dad's good side which was why he'd put up with the therapy. That and it was required by…Damn. How was he going to get out of that?

Mentally, he brushed it off, to worry about it later. Sometime when he didn't have a fearful alien menace attached to his arm.  The door required both hands, so Dib detached himself and pulled his key out of his pocket, slipping it in the lock the same time he let the print scanner run over his palm. With a beep of acceptance the door clicked and Dib pushed it open.

Zim huffed when Dib pulled their hands apart to unlock the door, but almost instantly seemed to forget about it when he saw the locking mechanism for the door.  He had never had a chance to see how it actually worked, and he was always a bit curious. He had to admit that it was a good strategy; he'd have to remember to adapt it into his own security system.

He watched Dib as he pushed the door open, and was a bit impressed. Dib's house always seemed to be far more advanced than most humans, although it was still inferior to even common Irken technology, of course.

He followed Dib into his house, feeling a bit strange that he was actually being invited in by him. He had always just snuck in, and was even invited in by Membrane once. He watched the back of Dib's head as he walked behind him, expecting him to whirl around and yell, "Ok, that's enough! Get out!"

He reached out to grab Dib's hand again, but decided against it, not wanting to push his luck, and put his hand down to his side once more. He looked around, taking in the living room for the first time. He was a bit put out by all the Membrane look-alikes in the room, especially the lamp. He didn't mind Membrane, but he had to admit that his height intimidated him a bit. He was relieved when Dib said he wasn't home.

He was silent as he followed Dib around, occasionally picking something up to observe it before carrying on, seemingly disinterested.

The teen kicked off his boots by the door before locking it again once the Irken was inside. He watched Zim for a second as he seemed to stare at his living room in awe, contact covered eyes darted around suspiciously as if waiting for a trap to spring which Dib had to admit was something he would be equally as frightened of had he been invited into Zim's base so easily.

The human smiled a bit before he turned his attention to the living room where the tv was turned to some old cartoon that illuminated the couch where he could see the top of his sister's head, bent in focus on her video game. "Hey!" He called to announce his presence in case she wasn't already aware of it.

In response he got a soft grunt, a hand thrown up in his direction. Whether it was a dismissal, or a greeting was unclear. Dib shrugged and strode to the kitchen, to get them some sodas or…something. Did Zim like sodas? Human ones. The irken had obviously liked the Milk shake. Chocolate was good too. As well as milk and sugar. He added that to his list of food that Irkens could apparently eat without exploding, expanding, smoking or growing horrendous boils.

Zim almost didn't see the tussle of purple hair that peeked over the back of the couch, and nearly jumped when he heard her grunt. He silently followed Dib into the kitchen, keeping an eye on the mop of purple hair, not wanting her to react to Zim being here. He hated Gaz, and was honestly creeped out by her.

Though making this known wasn't an option.
Dib dug in the fridge for two poop colas, popping his tab and holding the other up for Zim in case he wanted it. He breathed a sigh of relief when they made it into the kitchen, finally looking at Dib, who was happily holding out a can of soda for the alien.

Zim hesitated before taking the can out of Dib's hand, looking it over before pulling the tab back. He half-way expected it to do something terrible, and cringed when the click of the tin breaking was immediately followed by a loud hiss. He relaxed when nothing seemed to happen and peered into the can, not really knowing what he was looking for. He looked up quickly at Dib, who was patiently waiting to see Zim's reaction.

He took a quick sip and cringed a bit. The soda was slightly more acidic than what he was used to, but after the immediate sharpness of the beverage wore off, he was left with a pleasantly sweet flavor. His eyes lit up and he took another, more enthusiastic drink, smacking his lips in satisfaction.

"Not as good as Irken soda…..but at least it doesn't seem to be as dangerous as water."

Dib raised an eyebrow at the alien's review of the soda, smirking a bit when it proved to be what he expected. Grudging acceptance. "Huzzah." He took a large gulp of the drink, licking his lips to rid them of any excess before shuffling towards the stairs, glancing back at the alien as a sign to follow. "Heading upstairs, Gaz. Call if you need me." Of course she wouldn't but, he liked to let her know he was there. Just in case.

"Yeah, Yeah. Have fun with Zim." She yelled back, never lifting her eyes from her game consol. Dib was unsure if there was some sort of hidden meaning behind those words or if it was just something Gaz always said. There was no way she could know about the…stuff right? He shrugged, since it was impossible to know with his sister and continued up the stairs.

He took them two at a time since his legs were so long and practically skipped the last three, sliding down the hallway in his socked feet and throwing open his door. The teen nearly screeched to a halt, feeling a small pit of ridiculous embarrassment rise up in him. His room was a mess. As it always was. Plus, there were plenty of sketches and bad photographs of his enemy pasted everywhere…

Dib shook his head. 'Don't be stupid. Zim has seen this all before.' He murmured to himself before hopping over stuff to reach his computer chair, spinning it around to watch his unexpected guest enter right behind him.

Zim cringed at the sound of Gaz saying his name. He quickly followed Dib up the stairs, eager to get away from the boy's younger sister.  He stopped and watched him slide across the hall, a smirk bubbling up inside of him. He had never seen Dib do that before, and it was still new for Zim to see Dib so much at ease around him. He cupped his mouth and snickered a little at the sight, but quickly regained himself and followed the boy into his room.

As before, Zim had never had the chance to really take in Dib's bedroom. Whenever he was here, he was always on edge, and was completely fixated on the human. Now he finally had a chance to observe his surroundings a bit more. He had to admit to himself that he was a little excited about this.

He peered around, picking things up off the floor to look at them, and then tossing them back down when he held no further interest in them. He walked around them room, sipping his soda, looking at the covered walls. He was surprised to see how many photos of him were here. All this time he had been trying to keep Dib from exposing him, and all the while Dib had these photos of him hung on his wall like it was a Zim museum.

Honestly, he was a bit flattered; Dib had surrounded himself with the alien, even if it was just to expose him. But was it really necessary to hang them up on his wall in some sort of tribute? Zim smirked as he thought about it. He shot Dib a quick glance before taking an interest in some of the human's sketches.

As the Irken walked about the boy's room, picking and observing Dib couldn't help but feel a bit exposed. This was his living space. The one place where he put every bit of himself into it and the result came out messy, unorganized, frantic and obviously utterly obsessed with a certain alien monster.

Dib was trying very hard not to seem nervous and uneasy watching Zim examine his room but, it was difficult. So, he gave up trying to seem aloof and instead just stared, occasionally picking at his jeans where there was a bit of ketchup from his burger earlier and some paint from art class.

For a half a second their eyes met and it caused Dib to blink curiously. His gaze followed Zim's and he flushed. Oh Jeeze. His collection of pictures. They weren't that hard to miss considering they were virtually everywhere but, he'd never once thought that Zim would be in here, casually touring his room.

Some of the photographs were okay. Mainly blurry pictures from afar or times he'd managed to get it into Zim's face and it had been pushed away. Some of Gir. Of the Base. Tiny images of the voot crusier.

Then there were the sketches. Some of Zim's face. With and without the disguise. The um, anatomy. He'd taken a few guesses, thinking that Zim would be humanoid in figure but, probably bonier, with less fat and muscle as all humans tended to have for warmth and strength purposes since their PAK seemed to do all that for them.

Dib let out a huff of frustrated embarrassment and spun in his chair, shaking his mouse to rouse his computer. Maybe there had been updates on the Swollen Eyeball's end.

Zim sifted though the portraits, generally uninterested. He paused a few times to look at the ones Dib had drawn with him out of his disguise, but otherwise showed no immediate reaction. But stopped and looked puzzled for a moment, though, when he came across a sketch with a different angle.

Zim recognized it as himself, but he had to stare at it to wrap his mind around it completely. It was an almost accurate sketching of Zim, completely bare. The groin area seemed to be missing or incomplete, which confused Zim, but then again, the picture itself was just odd.

He turned to Dib, pointing at the picture accusingly, a dumfounded look on his face. When he saw that Dib wasn't looking, he cleared his throat loudly.

"What is this? Is this supposed to be ZIM? This is LAUGHABLE!" He pointed at the unfinished portion. "Unfinished, even!" Although it didn't occur to him that it was probably left for a reason.

Dib flinched at the sound of Zim's voice which was on a normal day loud and generally obnoxious, however in the midst of such a long day it was…coarse and ten times more grating than usual. He ground down on his teeth, deleting the tiny scrambled of random letters he'd accidently typed in when the silence had been shattered.

With a sigh he turned in his chair and glanced at where Zim was pointing. His ears turned a violent shade of red but, he attempted to keep his cool. "It was merely a guess at your anatomy. And of course it's unfinished. Like I want to think about that. Plus, I had no idea what um…" A hand waved at the Irken's body in general. "You know, was like. So shush."

Running a hand down his face, he spun in the chair and clicked the sleep button on his computer, took a long drag from his soda before getting up and walking towards his bed. On his way though, he grabbed the picture that Zim was exclaiming over and crumpled it into a ball before throwing it. God only knows if he would ever find it again. And he would attempt to find it again later, he knew.

That done, he flopped himself onto his bed, springs squeaking noisily as they had since he was ten.

Zim scrutinized the picture some more after Dib's brief and utterly unsatisfying explanation. He couldn't say he was surprised that Dib was curious, though. He had wondered about human anatomy at times, although mostly at the fact that there were so many shapes that humans came in.  

He huffed loudly when the picture was torn from his hands and crumpled up. He growled a bit and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Well," He began, his face suddenly growing hot as the memory of earlier today slowly crept up on him. "Now you have an idea, don't you? So no more bad doodles of Zim!" He stood, staring down at Dib as he lay on his bed, trying to seem as relaxed as possible, but he could feel the heat in his cheeks giving him away.

The human groaned as Zim just kept talking about the subject, flipping over on his back to stare up at his ceiling, before glancing at Zim. "Um. I'm just going to tell you that it's an awkward subject and that I'm changing it…" He cleared his throat and nodded, mainly to himself. "So, um, why are you here again? Something about me not thinking you're not real anymore?"

With a shove, he sat himself up on his bed which caused more horrid squeaking, and wrapped his arms around his knees. He really should he get ready for bed. But, it was impossible to do with Zim here. He would not get undressed with the alien in the room…although he'd been half naked plenty of times around him so it really didn't make any sense…Pfft whatever.

"If that's the case you don't have to worry. I know you're real. If I need proof I can just imagine your horribly loud voice or think of how annoyed you make me on a daily basis." Or the kiss. Es. Plural. Two in one day. More than two? Bleh. He didn't even know anymore.

His first kiss. And it had been with an alien. An alien who was his enemy. And who was male. There was a lot to think about. A lot that could possibly send him into a downward pit of psychological scars and revelations. Only there would be no thinking with said object of thought around being…looming and sneering about his poor drawing skills.

Zim was about to question Dib on the whole "changing the subject" thing when the new subject was already brought to life. Zim sighed as relaxed a bit, looking around the room once more, only this time as more of a distraction, rather than actual interest. He fidgeted about in his spot, recalling the vacant stare Dib had given him a week before, and how hard Zim had to convince the human he was real, only to have it fall flat.

"Yes, well. As annoying as you are, Dib, it was more annoying for you to just ignore me." He quickly grew defensive and pointed a gloved claw at the human. "And last time you said you believed in Zim, but then ignored me again! I know that woman is out of the picture now, but how can I be sure her…brain washing hasn't worn off?"

A sincere and heartfelt worry was seeded in his words. He crossed his arms again and looked around once more, not able to meet the gaze of the human who was sitting in front of him.

He was so close, and yet he had somehow distanced himself from the alien. Zim wanted to feel his warmth again, but somehow Zim knew that it wasn't the right time. He sighed loudly as he tried to think of the right way to say it, without truly confessing his insecurities to Dib.

"I don't like when you do that; when you look at me like Zim's not really in front of you." He growled a bit and finally locked eyes with the raven haired boy. "And I never know when you are going to do it next! It's infuriating!" He grumbled, looking down at his feet as he shuffled them. He had managed to confess himself, even though he didn't want to. He hated Dib for making it so difficult.

"And Zim isn't sure what you want, still. We are enemies, but you said enemies don't do the kissing thing." Zim continued to fidget, not sure what to do with himself. He felt his cheeks growing hot again, and it seemed like all his effort was put into keeping his breath steady. He wished Dib would just explain what was happening, because Zim had no idea, and he just felt flustered.

Dib wasn't ready for the flood of information from his enemy that suddenly bombarded him. How long had that been building up inside the Irken? He shook his head. Didn't matter. The fact was that it had and now he had to contend with it if he wished to…go any further…with…whatever it is they…were.

A nail bitten hand ran through messy hair, before plopping down on the ufo bed spread. "Fine. Okay. I can assure you that the 'brain washing' is over. If anything that woman was fake. Fake nails, dyed hair, make-up all over her face. And you're…well, you. Despite the disguise you don on a daily basis, I know what I get when I see you; a loud, obnoxious, violent, short, green alien."

Quickly, he glanced at the irken to see his reaction, before staring back down at his hands. "I know you're real. If I doubt it I can look in a mirror. I've got memories, our stories and fight written all over me. "Even now, looking down at his hands, there were long, claw marks. A few scrapes on his knuckles from the pavement.

"And I can look at you." He did, staring into the contact covered eyes, knowing that beneath them lie so much more. Ruby red jewels. Like the sky and sun. Like blood and madness. "You've got the stories too. I've hurt you before and I can see every time I've done so."

With a unsteady sigh, the human flopped backwards onto his bed to stare up at the ceiling. Of course there were more pictures up there. Designs and plans of action. "And I'm not sure what we are…if anything. All I know is that I'm still going to defend the earth from any plans you might come up with," As stupid as they may be.

"But, I also know that I like…being with you." Kissing and hand holding, too. But, it went deeper than that. So much deeper…he just needed to figure out how deep he could go before drowning.
"So, that's why I need to think." Reluctantly, he looked at the irken out of the corner of his eye. "We both need to."
Ch.8->[link]

Ch.10-> [link]

This is an experiment. We might be changing update days to Monday/Friday if this goes well.
Tell me what you think, please. Of the new dates and this chapter.
© 2012 - 2024 Gayliens
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Annaley's avatar
Where is the next chapter?